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The Bondie Awards

Hollywood (Reuters) – All of Hollywood turned their attention to 007Forever, Sunday, March 25th, 2001 as the 1st Annual “Bondies” were handed out. The Bondies celebrate the best, and worst, in 007 cinematic achievement. Recipients of the Best Artistic and Technical awards received a 6-inch tall, 24 karat, gold-plated statuette of the classic tuxedoed action icon while winners of the “Worst” categories received their prize, a check for a $1.98 and a hard-plastic, metallic-gold, spray-painted statuette, at a star-studded, all-you-can-eat buffet dinner hosted by Shoney`s.

Though few stars nominated for the WORST categories showed up, a couple did manage to come in and take advantage of the all-you-can-eat buffet. Icebreaker hosted the event and got the evening off to a hot start by announcing the winner of the WORST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A LEADING OR SUPPORTING ROLE.

Folks, it was not even a competition. It was a massacre. Tanya Roberts handily won this category witha whopping 60% of the vote total. Poor Denise Richards could only garner a measly 27% of the vote. Talisa Soto, Mie Hama, and Akiki Wakabayashi were way behind in single digits.

Mrs. Roberts was also our first inductee into the 007Forever Hall of Shame for a performance so bad that it literally brings tears of pain to the eyes of everyone who watches it 16 years later. Ms. Roberts, accompanied to the stage by her husband, accosted Icebreaker and angrily grabbed the plastic statuette and check out of his hands. She said: “You can take this check and sho-“. Before she could finish her sentence, her husband interrupted: “Don`t bother Tanya. He`s a psychopath.” Moving on…

The award for WORST PERFORMANCE BY AN INANIMATE OBJECT was Sean Connery`s toupee in Never Say Never Again, winning a staggering vote total of 75%.

For WORST ACTOR, the race was only slightly closer. Sausage king Jimmy Dean led the pack with over 40% of the votes, while Alan Cummings and Michael Lonsdale race a close second with 19% and 20% of the votes respectively. Christopher Lee and Curt Jurgens were a distant 4th and 5th place.

WORST ORIGINAL SCORE was another blowout. Michael LeGrand handily beat his competition with more than half of all ballots cast. Eric Serra had a strong second place showing, but both David Arnold, Bill Conti and Michael Kamen were in distant 3rd, 4th and 5th place.

WORST TITLE OR THEME SONG was extremely close, with Eric Serra`s Experience of Love running neck and neck with Lani Hall`s Never Say Never Again but in the end, Eric Serra won out. The deciding vote was cast by Jeremy Schabow. Yes folks, the race was that tight.

WORST SCREENPLAY was a bit closer, but Casino Royale still managed to win that contest by 11 percentage points. Never Say Never Again came in with 30% of the vote. LTK, TND and TMWTGG were far behind.

WORST DIRECTOR was another blowout. Irvin Kershner easily won that honor with a whopping 42% of the vote. Everyone else was a distant 2nd through 5th place.

WORST FILM was somewhat a suprise, as most picked Casino Royale for that award, shocking industry insiders who believed License To Kill would walk away with that coveted honor. Casino Royale had 41% of the vote, with Never Say Never Again getting 25%. Everyone else had meager votes cast.

When it comes to BEST 007, Sean Connery is the winner hands down. His performance in Goldfinger won for BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR PLAYING JAMES BOND with 35% of the vote. Connery also came in 2nd with 21% of the vote for his performance in the scene where 007 kills professor Dent. Timothy Dalton came in with a close 3rd place finishing for his performance in License To Kill. Apparently a lot of people loved his line delivery when he sent Killifer to the sharks. George Lazenby cradling a dead Tracy garnered 17% of the vote and for some bizarre reason, neither one of Roger Moore`s scenes received more than 4% of the vote. We think the ballot may have confused some voters who probably meant to vote for Moore rather than Lazenby, so we are going to disqualify these results.

Shirley Bassey won for BEST TITLE OR THEME SONG with her rendition of Goldfinger.

John Barry was up four times in the category of BEST ORIGINAL SCORE and won by a huge margin for his work in ON HER MAJESTY`S SECRET SERVICE with 62% of the vote.

Judi Dench lost an Oscar for “Chocolat” but won a “Bondie” for her performance in THE WORLD IS NOT ENOUGH with 44% of the vote. Lucianna Paluzzi came in a close 2nd with 37%.

Desmond Llewelyn handily beat his competition for BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR with 46% of the vote.

Diana Rigg won big for her role as Tracy in ON HER MAJESTY`S SECRET SERVICE. She had nearly double what her next closest competitor, Sophie Marceau with 22%, got.

Sean Bean won for BEST ACTOR by beating out rival villain Robert Davi. Bean garnered 36% of the vote.

Richard Maibaum was the surprise winner for BEST SCREENPLAY with ON HER MAJESTY`S SECRET SERVICE. Maibaum was unable to attend the ceremony and receive his award due to his being dead. 007Forever accepts this award on his behalf.

Guy Hamilton won the Bondie for BEST DIRECTOR for his work on The Man With The Golden Gun. Just kidding! Yeah, it was Goldfinger he won for. Everyone knew that was coming. No one was within striking distance, though Michael Apted did manage a very respectable 2nd place showing with 20% of the vote.

And last but not least was BEST PICTURE and to no one`s suprise, GOLDFINGER beat everyone to a bloody pulp with 50% of the vote total.

With all awards shows, some of the major surprises included those who didn`t win. Octopussy managed to be shut out of every category, while On Her Majesty`s Secret Service and Goldfinger all had good nights, racking up several Bondies each. The nominees were as follows:

For artistic merit:

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE
Judi Dench (The World Is Not Enough)
Luccianna Paluzzi (Thunderball)
Barbara Carrera (Never Say Never Again)
Gloria Hendry (Live and Let Die)
Grace Jones (A View To A Kill)

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE
Sophie Marceau (The World Is Not Enough)
Diana Rigg (On Her Majesty`s Secret Service
Izzabella Scorupco (Goldeneye)
Honor Blackman (Goldfinger)
Maud Adams (Octopussy)

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE
Vijay Armitraj (Octopussy)
Desmond Llewelyn (Octopussy)
Joe Don Baker (The Living Daylights)
Clifton James (Live and Let Die)
Robert Carlyle (The World Is Not Enough)

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE
Louis Jourdan (Octopussy)
Christopher Walken (A View To A Kill)
Klaus Maria-Brandauer (Never Say Never Again)
Robert Davi (License To Kill)
Sean Bean (Goldeneye)

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR PLAYING JAMES BOND
George Lazenby (holding his dead wife in On Her Majesty`s Secret ServiceL)
Sean Connery (shooting Professor Dent in Dr.No)
Sean Connery (strapped to a laser table in Goldfinger)
Roger Moore (confessing to killing Anya`s lover in The Spy Who Loved Me
Roger Moore (confronting General Orlov and defusing the bomb in the circus in Octopussy
Timothy Dalton (“You earned it. You keep it, old buddy!” from License To Kill)

BEST DIRECTOR
Michael Apted (The World Is Not Enough)
John Glen (The Living Daylights)
John Glen (Octopussy)
Guy Hamilton (Goldfinger)
Lewis Gilbert (The Spy Who Loved Me)

BEST SCREENPLAY
Richard Maibaum and Michael G. Wilson (The Living Daylights)
Richard Maibaum and Michael G. Wilson (Octopussy)
Richard Maibaum and Paul Dehn (Goldfinger)
Richard Maibaum and Joanna Harwood (Dr.No)
Richard Maibaum and Simon Raven (On Her Majesty`s Secret Service)

BEST MOTION PICTURE
The World Is Not Enough
Goldfinger
The Spy Who Loved Me
The Living Daylights
On Her Majesty`s Secret Service

Technical Achievements:

BEST SET DESIGN
Ken Adam (Fort Knox-Goldfinger)
Ken Adam (Blofeld`s volcano – You Only Live Twice)
Ken Adam (The Liparus – The Spy Who Loved Me)
Ken Adam and Anton Furst for (Drax`s Space Station- Moonraker)
Peter Lamont (The Mainstrike Mine – A View To A Kill)

BEST COSTUME DESIGN
Emma Porteous for The Living Daylights (Kara and Bond`s Afghan wear)
Emma Porteous for Octopussy (Octopussy`s royal palace wear)
Marjory Cornelius for On Her Majesty`s Secret Service (Blofeld`s Angel`s wear)
Anthony Mendelson for Thunderball (Junkanoo costumes and formal wear)
Emma Porteous for A View To A Kill (Ascot racing wear)

BEST THEME OR TITLESONG
Paul McCartney and Wings (Live and Let Die)
Carly Simon (Nobody Does It Better-The Spy Who Loved Me)
Sheena Easton (For Your Eyes Only)
Duran Duran (A View To A Kill)
Shirley Bassey (Goldfinger)

BEST ORIGINALSCORE
John Barry (Goldfinger)
John Barry (On Her Majesty`s Secret Service)
John Barry (Octopussy)
John Barry (Moonraker)
George Martin (Live and Let Die)

Awards for dubious artistic and technical achievement:

WORST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A LEADING OR SUPPORTING ROLE:
Tanya Roberts (A View To A Kill)
Talisa Soto (License To Kill)
Mie Hama (You Only Live Twice)
Akiki Wakabayashi (You Only Live Twice)
Denise Richards (The World Is Not Enough)

WORST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A LEADING OR SUPPORTING ROLE
Jimmy Dean (Diamonds Are Forever)
Alan Cummings (Goldeneye)
Michael Londsdale (Moonraker)
Curt Jurgens (The Spy Who Loved Me)
Christopher Lee (The Man With The Golden Gun)

WORST SCREENPLAY
License To Kill
The Man With The Golden Gun
Never Say Never Again
Casino Royale (1967)
Tomorrow Never Dies

WORST DIRECTOR
Roger Spottiswoode (Tomorrow Never Dies)
John Glen (A View To A Kill)
Guy Hamilton (The Man With The Golden Gun)
Lewis Gilbert (Moonraker)
Irvin Kershner (Never Say Never Again)

WORST FILM
The Man With The Golden Gun
Never Say Never Again
Casino Royale
License To Kill
Moonraker

WORST TITLE OR THEME SONG
Lani Hall (Never Say Never Again)
Eric Serra (The Experience of Love)
Rage (Make It Last All Night-For Your Eyes Only)
Sheryl Crow (Tomorrow Never Dies)
Scott Walker (Only Myself to Blame-The World Is Not Enough)

WORST ORIGINAL SCORE
Eric Serra (Goldeneye)
Bill Conti (For Your Eyes Only)
Michael LeGrand (Never Say Never Again)
David Arnold (The World Is Not Enough)
Michael Kamen (License To Kill)

WORST PEFORMANCE BY AN INANIMATE OBJECT
Roger Moore (A View To A Kill)
Sean Connery`s toupee (Never Say Never Again)
Roger Moore`s eyebrows (Octopussy)
Sean Connery`s baby blue, terry cloth robe (Goldfinger)
Roger Moore`s “colostomy bag” (The Spy Who Loved Me)

Film Bloopers: The Eye That Never Sleeps

“The Eye That Never Sleeps” is more than a chapter designation in Ian Fleming’s novel, “Diamonds Are Forever”. It is an expression we coin at 007Forever to refer to the watchful eyes of line producers, directors, script editors, etc. who are vigilant to check on their films in progress for “bad matches,” moments when movie continuity or logic goes awry.

It stands as a great testimony to the staff of EON Productions these last 35-plus years that the Bond films are as outstanding as they are, with few goofs, though fanatics who have seen the movie 97 times always manage to catch something…

If you see bugaboos not reported here send them along to us online!

Cheers and happy viewing!

YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE
While Bond is in the car with Aki and talking on the monitor with Tiger Tanaka, the background and foreground projection shows a bend coming up in the road but Aki doesn`t turn the steering wheel so technically they should have gone straight off.

DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER
Gun barrel opening: Bond stumbles during his turn and shoot as in Thunderball and You Only Live Twice.

In the scene with “Marie,” the camera cuts to a shot of Bond, who moves too far away at one point, too close for a conversation and back again. Dubbing is not too hot here either. Check it out.

Q’s Amazing Jacket: During the teaser, Bond splashes mud on his jacket. He stands up and the jacket is spotless again. Squirting “Blofeld” with water in that scene, the “deceased” blinks and flinches.

Maurice Binder’s main sequence has Blofeld’s cat do a few strange moves across the titles. Watch closely.

As Sir Donald walks to his liquor table and Bond follows, the camera and crew are a reflection in Munger’s bookcase. Same thing happens as Peter Franks drives to the customs office and parks his car out front of an office window. The crew lingers even as Moneypenny grabs Bond’s car.

Sir Donald says, “The whole process, from start to finish, operates under an airtight security system. It’s an essential precaution, even though the industry prides itself on the loyalty and devotion of its workers.” The second time he repeats this entire line!, he adds the word “necessary” after “essential.”

Wint kills the dentist with a deadly and dreaded rubber scorpion. Beware this incredibly deadly beast in the Las Vegas desert also! Watch out!

The helicopter lands in the desert with a red stripe on the rear of the craft. Wint and Kidd hand the pilot a box containing diamonds as the red stripe changes to a green stripe.

The famous elevator fight is one of the finest action scenes ever shot on film. Peter Franks hefts a crowbar, however, that he mysteriously drops, re-lifts and drops again very quickly as he is sprayed with the fire extinguisher.

Shady Tree opens Bond’s smoking hot coffin with his bare hands. Ouch!
Willard Whyte spares no expense, even for his pipeline, inside which, underground at night, Bond can see quite well, thanks.
In the sideshow at the casino, the fellow running the action identifies “the beast” as originating from Nairobi, South Africa. Nairobi is in Kenya, not even in Southern Africa.

Bond’s famous rental, a ‘71 Ford Mustang, has California plates at the shop in Las Vegas. Bond leaves McCarrin Airport in the ‘Stang, driving it just down the street and into the lot of the “Whyte House”—a movie “fast trip” if ever there was one. If we can go that fast in July, we will see plenty of sights during our Bond Weekend 1999!

Bond sneaks aboard Dr. Metz’s minivan with a henchman in a car behind the minivan—the henchman does not bat an eye at Bond’s breaking and entering! The bumbling Metz does not notice Tiffany Case following close behind all the way to Techtronics, either.

The moonbuggy crashes through the wall of Techtronics through a rather small hole—watch closely. The famous buggy wheel flies off and back on again in two quick cuts. “Q” picked up a variation on this in a recent BMW sedan, you know—re-inflating tires, actually John Gardner’s idea.

Leaving Techtronics, 00-you-know-who says “If you see a mad professor in a mini bus, just smile.” The boom microphone on the shoot appears in the front windshield and throughout this entire scene.

During the car chase down Fremont Street, it appears as if people have gathered to watch the filming of a movie—not too much different from our Bond Weekends, really, when we wear our costumes on Friday night! During the chase, when cars go on the sidewalk, four people are nearly struck. They run out of the way just in time—actually disappearing like David Copperfield in the next shot! Watch closely.

Luckily, outside the Golden Nugget casino, a barricade is thoughtfully blocking pedestrians from injury! (Bond drives past the Golden Nugget Casino a dozen times in less than a few seconds, by the way—those Mustangs do go fast.)

When the police chase Bond and Tiffany through the parking lot, you can see wooden panels on the side of a building to cushion the impact of the police car, which crashes into it.

Need we mention that Bond tilts the Mustang to the right to get through the gap between buildings, but upon emerging, the car is tilted to the left? Probably not, but did you notice the fake alleyway was widened for the Mustang to pass through, then narrowed so the police car couldn’t give chase? The Mustang was angled wider on two wheels than on four.

When Bond rides the elevator outside the Whyte House, you can see his shadow on the street below. This is when he is at the top of the elevator. Now 007 casts a big shadow, but not that big. Apparently, his shadow is on the rear projection screen that shows the background of the street.

When Bond seeks help from Q in finding Willard Whyte, Q changes Bond’s voice so that he sounds like Blofeld’s accomplice, Bert Saxby. Blofeld gives “Saxby” an order to assassinate Willard Whyte. How does the real Saxby know to do so later?

When Bond is fighting Bambi and Thumper they throw him into a stack of metal tubes. You can see that all the tubes fall over Bond, but the last one takes a little longer time before it falls over completely. Once this tube hits the floor, there is no loud crash like there was for the previous ones—perhaps another of Q’s patented tricks.

During the fight between Bambi and Thumper, a close look at the black villainess’s dive into the pool shows her to be a different stunt actress, wearing a wig. Once she is in the pool, however, she is clearly a white stuntwoman in poor makeup!

After Bambi and Thumper have pushed Bond in the pool, he manages to get the upper hand and hold them underwater. His hair is a mess—obviously, Roger Moore was called in as a stunt double, though, for Bond’s coif is back to normal, moments later. During the pool fight, Bond holds Bambi underwater with his right hand and a moment later releases her from under his left hand. Following the above, Bond climbs out of the pool completely soaked yet his clothes are dryer than his martini when he meets Willard Whyte!

Saxby is shot in typical Bond style, with little blood and no bullet hole.

When Q uses his “RPM controller” in the Whyte House casino, no jackpot bells indicate any big wins.

It is essential to the plot that Tiffany is ignorant that Blofeld runs the smuggling pipeline. She tells Bond, “All I hear are voices on the phone…” yet she chooses to follow Blofeld walking through the hotel lobby with “her” white cat.

Master chemist and scientist Ernst Blofeld says, “Science was never my strong suit!” Charles Gray as Blofeld also has a full head of hair. Apparently, he is not just the President of SPECTRE, he’s also a member!

Q’s “inflatable container” for the oil rig scene is truly wondrous—its parachutes unhook and completely disappear without any aid from Bond. Did you catch those inflatables again lately in the movie The Avengers?

Bond escapes from confinement under the oil rig and bullets impact close to him. An explosives charge to simulate bullet hits can be seen in mid-air and a plume of smoke when the “gunshots” have ceased.

Five “good guy” helicopters fight the oil rig, including one carrying Willard Whyte, who manages to switch copters in mid-air. Watch closely for his “different” than “same” copter.

LIVE AND LET DIE
The high priest is bitten by his snakes when he fells into the coffin. But minutes later he stands with a snake above his head. (By the way – it is NOT a poisonus snake – it is a constrictor!!!)

THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN
In the pretitle sequence an assasin is sent to kill Scaramanga. On his gun he carries a silencer, yet when he shoots it, you can clearly hear the sound of a gun without the silencer attached.

THE SPY WHO LOVED ME
When James takes the Lotus Esprit into the water, he askes her if she can swim and Anya lets out a scream of fright. Yet minutes later she is pushing buttons in the car and confessing she stole the blueprints to the car years ago. Well, if she stole the blueprints years ago, why was she so scared?

Bond is fleeing his pursuers on skis in Austria (actually Asgards Peak in Canada) when he skis off a cliff. Look closely and you will see the path had been cleared previously by the crew for the stunt to take place.

MOONRAKER
When Bond is fighting in the plane if you look at the flap at the back of his jacket there are two slits but when he has been pushed out of the plane the jacket changes to just one slit at the back.

FOR YOUR EYES ONLY
Playing Chemin de Fer, 007 gets a five and an ace. Yet the croupier gives Bond the win by stating he accumulated a count of nine.

When Bond kicks Locques car over the cliff you can see that the car has no engine. Yet it was a fully functioning car just seconds before. Did Bond strip the car for it`s engine and other parts before killing Locque? And when Locque`s body is thrown from the car, it`s clear that the “body” is a dummy, or mannequin.

In the sunken ship sequence between Bond, Melina, and the intruder in the diving suit, a cable can be seen pulling Mrs. Bouqet up towards the ceiling in order to “tear” her wetsuit. The man in the diving suit was supposed to be strong enough to push Melina up towards the ceiling, but the producers obviously gave him a little help.

OCTOPUSSY
In the pre-credits sequence, as the Acrostar flies through the warehouse, you can see if you look carefully enough the pole upon which the mock jet is impaled on.

When Vijay is “fishing” (while James is with Octopussy), his shirt is 2 buttons shy of being buttoned to the top. When the intruders sneak attack him from front and behind, they rip his shirt 4 buttons down and nearly to the navel. Then when Gobinda walks down the steps and looks at Vijay, his shirt is back to being buttoned 2 buttons from the top. Then, when we look at Vijay from the vantage point of the goon with the buzzsaw, we see Vijay`s shirt is unbuttoned 3 or 4 notches again.

During the film`s climax, the stuntman doubling for 007`s parachute can clearly be seen when the wind blows open his jacket. Later, when Gobinda falls off the plane, you can clearly see the orange straps of his parachute underneath his jacket as he spins away.

A VIEW TO A KILL
Mayday and Zorin put Bond in the Rolls Royce and let it roll into the lake. Yet you can see the cable pulling the car into the lake (obviously gravity needed a helping hand).

In the mine shaft scene between Bond, Mayday and Stacy, Mayday grabs Stacy`s uniform and tries ripping it to shreds. Stacy slips out of it in an effort to give Mayday the slip, but Mayday rips the left side of Stacy`s skirt clear up the left thigh. And yet amazingly Stacy emerges from the shaft with skirt intact. She`s also wearing high heels, but on the Golden Gate Bridge her heels somehow managed to give way to flat heeled shoes.

How does Stacy manage to be snuck upon by a blimp? In any case, the harness that holds Christopher Walken in as he reaches out to grab Tanya Roberts can clearly be seen for about two seconds. Also, note the change in hair style between Mrs. Roberts and her stuntwoman as the stuntwoman gets swept up into the zeppelin.

THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS
When James and Kara are surrounded by Czech police out on the large, icy lake, Kara yells out James` name. Yet he had never told her his name. How did she know? 007 would never have passed up an opportunity to say his famous line.

The hole in the ice that Bond`s tire rim cut is quite large when first cut. But when the police car falls into the lake, the circle seems to have shrunk. Also, notice how Bond`s car tire is blown off in one sequence but then later shows up when he makes the car jump over the Czech border patrol. Apparently “Q” invented re-inflating tires but failed to publcize the invention till Bond`s Tomorrow Never Dies mission.

Kara makes Bond a vodka martini at their villa in Tangier. She asks him: “Did I get it right?”, implying that they`d not only had drinks before, but that he`d taken the time to show her how he likes his martini made. Yet when was there ever time to stop for martinis?

During the climactic showdown in the C-130 Hercules (disguised to represent a Russian transporter), Necros and Bond fight in the bay doors. They are clearly open. But then in the very next wide shot of the plane, the cargo doors are closed. Not only are the doors closed, but the wire the model is hanging on shimmers ever so briefly in the light.

Bond tells Kara to get in the jeep quickly. There`s no place to land. The plane`s propellers stop twirling in mid air, yet before it crashes all four propellers are twirling again. What`s worse, when Bond and Kara propel out of the back of the plane, it`s mere feet off the ground. Yet when it slams into the mountain, it has managed to climb several hundred feet in seconds.

Bond infiltrates Whitaker`s villa in the dead of night. Yet when he knocks out the guard patrolling the pool area, it is daylight outside. Somone did a poor job of masking or filtering the time of day the scene was shot.

When Koskov`s plane lands in Afghanistan, it`s equipped with a kitchen, overhead compartments, and seated rows. The next day none of that is in the plane, and instead a jeep has been put in place. While this isn`t technically a blooper, did Koskov switch planes? Was the plane`s seating area portable? A little explanation wouldn`t have hurt. Then there`s the matter of Kara, Necros and Koskov and Saunder`s assasination at Prater Park. It`s hard to believe that Necros didn`t know that Koskov had a girlfriend, let alone that she was the sniper and was alive and well and with Bond in Prater Park. If he had, the whole dynamic of his plan would`ve changed because he then would`ve known Bond was on to the three of them (Necros, Koskov and Whitaker).

LICENSE TO KILL
Bond, in a stolen tanker truck, realizes he`s about to be shot at with one of the Stinger Missles. So he steers the tanker over a mini-hill and tilts the truck on it`s left wheels. This allows the Stinger Missle to miss Bond and hit a tanker Bond forced into the side of a mountain minutes earlier. The only problem with this sequence is the long shot that shows the area behind Bond is flat, straight and without a tanker truck.

Bond mentions to Lupe that he thought she hated “that thing” (the Iguana). How could he know that since he wasn`t around when she told that to Sanchez?

In “License”, Bond and Leiter can be seen circling the church at low altitudes in the chopper, but when they jump out, they are suddenly very high up!

In License To Kill, Sanchez gets back at Leiter for capturing him. Leiter is permanently maimed, and his new bride raped and murdered. The question is: Why wasn`t there retaliation against Bond? After all, it was Bond that reeled Sanchezes plane in. The writers threw in the line that Bond was “just along for the ride”, but that was essentially thrown in to make it look like Sanchez wouldn`t waste his time on a man like Bond, and thus allow Bond to track Sanchez down in Isthmus and kill him. This still doesn`t make sense because Bond goes to Isthmus and uses his real name. It`s highly unlikely that Bond`s name never came up when Killifer briefed Sanchez on who captured him. If Sanchez was only interested in Leiter, why kill Della? Essentially, this was one plot point injustice overlooked that eventually created even more plot holes.

GOLDENEYE
When Bond and Natalya slide down the dish, pads and rollers can clearly be seen underneath them in several key shots (particularly when Natalya`s legs are up in the air).

James and Natalya are nearly over the lake and into the woods, yet when then the missle hits the plane there manages to be enough water for the plane to skid across.

When Bond leaves the casino and runs up the stairs at the outdoor theatre, he views the yacht by putting the single lens of the binoculars to his LEFT eye. Then the scene cuts to the nameplate of the yacht (MANTICORE) and Bond is looking through the lens with his RIGHT eye–Alex Ayres

Why do Trevelyan’s guards shoot machine guns near 006’s gas tanks, the very thing someone was killed for earlier in Russia? Did Bond then slide a gun or a limpet mine across the floor? Watch carefully.

Bond somehow gets a pair of racing gloves on while riding the second motorcycle.

Questionable: When Bond is done racing Onatopp, the MI6 evaluator demands that Bond stop the car at once. Bond pulls the emergency brake, and stops the car. The problem is this: Bond is driving on the right side of the car, but he is shown pulling the emergency brake with his right hand. The emergency brake is in the middle, so how could Bond pull the brake with his right hand?

Answer: On all Aston Martin DB5s, the emergency brake is located between the driver’s seat and the door. It is perfectly normal for Bond to pull the emergency brake with his right hand. (Yes, you have to climb over it to get out of the car!)

The Aston Martin DBS and V8 cars have their brake in the middle, and the DB7 put it back out by the door again (though in recent models it retracts after being set).

It was, however, stupid of Bond to pull the brake–since locking the Aston`s rear wheels would make his car skid sideways–out of control. With four-wheel power disc brakes at his disposal, using the mechanical handbrake was reckless and irresponsible. Q would have told him that. –Tim Adams and Jim Sieff

Bond’s plane is just crossing the shoreline when he is struck by a missle yet his plane makes it safely to land.

Natalya’s gun in hand flips back and forth due to an editing error when she has boarded a helicopter.

TOMORROW NEVER DIES
When Bond first uses his Ericcson Cellular to drive the car remotely at the airport, you can see someone driving it in the floorboard. His shadow is briefly visible.

Bond and Wai Lin both take an outdoor shower in the slums of Vietnam. And yet when Wai Lin handcuffs Bond to the shower and walks off to retreive her flowery shirt, she is suddenly dry as a desert and her hair is wind blown and perfectly coiffed.

In Tomorrow Never Dies, Stamper is on a roof across Bonds hotel. First, there is a view from above with a black Merc SL in front of the Hotel, then it is gone only to reappear (after a quick spin arond the block?)

When the BMW goes off the roof of the parking deck, you can see that the car has a tinted glass moonroof – not the body-color metal sunroof that you see on the car in all the other scenes. Also, in the `driverless` chase scene, you can see black spots on the front of the side view mirrors which were the cameras the real driver used to see where he was going. (The info on the cameras came from a great article published in the BMW Car Club of America`s magazine — Roundel –around the time TND was released.) D. Ziglar contributed to this report.

THE WORLD IS NOT ENOUGH
Elektra King’s earrings come on and off mysteriouslywithout explanation. This scene has another continutity error when Valentine bursts into through the door to see his nephew’s hat on a table. You see Elektra grab the gun and hat…twice!

How does Bond’s Z8 come back together again for the end of the film?

Bond and Jones jump out of the pipeline with Bond’s left jacket sleeve ripped and repaired again mysteriously.

The sunglasses that Bond wears while skiing are the CK 2007 shades. The sunglasses Bond wears in the casino are quite different. The CK 2007 has thicker, wider frames and arms around the wearer’s ear. The CK 2007 were not blue though the casino glasses were.

Tomorrow Never Dies’ Soundtrack Is Reminiscent Of Other Films…Why?

There are many allusions to other soundtracks, both Bond and non-Bond. Those with sharp ears can hear cues from “Cape Fear” (Bernard Hermann), “The Russia House” (Jerry Goldsmith), “F/X” (Bill Conti), and even from “The Godfather, Part III”. Oddly, you can hear parts of the “Surrender” theme in Sheryl Crow`s song “If It Makes You Happy”. Listen closely to the segment approximately three minutes into (about 70% of the way through) the song.

Allusions to other Bond soundtracks (by John Barry, Michael Kamen and Bill Conti) are numerous and almost pointless to list. Those who`ve heard Arnold’s Godzilla score should recognize the “march” cue from Octopussy”.

Music: The Living Daylights Rykodisc Reissue CD

Original album:

1. The Living Daylights (4:14)
2. Necros Attacks (2:02)
3. The Sniper Was a Woman (2:28)
4. Ice Chase (4:03)
5. Kara Meets Bond (2:45)
6. Koskov Escapes (2:22)
7. Where Has Everybody Gone (3:35)
8. Into Vienna (2:48)
9. Hercules Takes Off (2:15)
10. Mujahadin and Opium (3:11)
11. Inflight Fight (3:10)
12. If There Was a Man (2:49)

Bonus Material:

13. Exercise at Gibraltar (6:20)
14. Approaching Kara (2:19)
15. Murder at the Fair (2:19)
16. Assassin and Drugged (2:41)
17. Airbase Jailbreak (4:35)
18. Afganistan Plan (3:32)
19. Air Bond (1:44)
20. Final Confrontation (1:56)
21. Alternate End Titles (3:20)

The bonus tracks total 29 minutes, so the total disc time is now 65 minutes. The unreleased material was put at the end and not spread out through primarily to keep the original album material compact and seperate from the new material. “Exercise at Gibraltar” is the entire pre-credits sequence, from the gunbarrel music to the jeep flying off the cliff with Bond parachuting out. “Afganistan Plan” are the cues for Bond trying to slip the bomb onto the plane at the airfield. “Air Bond” is the great music as Bond drops a bomb on the Afganistan bridge, and then exits the plane with Kara in a jeep. “Final Confrontation” contains the three short cues as Bond defeats Joe Don Baker`s character in his lair. The “Alternate End Titles” is an instrumental version of “If There Was a Man” without the pop- percussion tracks.

Music: The Duran Duran Tribute Album

Lyrics by Duran Duran; Produced, mixed & engineered by Theo Goutzinakis & Tom Thacker; Recorded at Utopia Parkway, Vancouver, British Columbia

If anyone is thinking of buying The Duran Duran Tribute Album in order to hear Gob`s cover version of A VIEW TO A KILL, one would be well advised to stay far, far away. This unambitious piece of aural dreck manages to cram into fifty-eight seconds what it took Duran Duran three and a half minutes to sing. Perhaps it`s easier to deal with the pain if it goes by more quickly, because listening to this version of what is arguably the best Bond song ever produced is a painful and arduous task. The hard pounding punk rythyms and screaching vocals can`t adequately cover up the lack of talent that went into reproducing this song. All involved in the creation of this musical fiasco should be tarred and feathered

The tribute album is cram packed with ska/metal bands doing their best to do their worst when it comes to warbling Duran Duran tunes, but only A VIEW TO A KILL would be of any note to Bond fans. Please, if you only believe one thing we tell you, believe this: Gob`s rendition of A VIEW TO A KILL is so bad you`ll wish you were deaf. My only regret is that I can`t give it less than zero stars.

Music: Octopussy Soundtrack Rykodisc Reissue CD

Ryodisk has reissued one of John Barry`s greatest scores: Octopussy. This is the first time in over a decade that the Octopussy soundtrack has been available to the public. Digitally remastered, it also contains so many Bond goodies that you`d be a fool to pass it up. Included are:

3 “Bonus” tracks which are, in actuality, dialouge from the film (Track 3 Miss Penolope; Track 7 Introducing Mr. Bond; Track 10 Poison Pen) Contains the theatrical trailer to the film embedded in the CD, plus it opens up your web browser to the Ryodisk Website a large insert filled with background notes. Flip it over and it turns into the original poster for the film. Foreword by Geoff Leonard, alt.fan.james-bond regular contributor and author of an upcoming book about John Barry.

Music: James Bond NOW

Normally another album of James Bond cover tunes is about as welcome as a Christmas fruit log, but I`m happy to say that not only is “James Bond NOW” a worthy entry into the 007 musical legacy, it actually manages to breathe new life into a few songs.

The album is a ten song, primarily instrumental, set. Track listings in order are:

Goldfinger (4:29)
Live and Let Die (4:27)
Diamonds Are Forever (3:54)
For Your Eyes Only (3:11)
Shaken Not Stirred (3:37)
From Russia, With Love (4:55)
Nobody Does It Better (5:04)
**Silken Cover (original composition) (3:53)
The James Bond Theme (3:58)
**Copacabinksy (original composition) (4:25)

The album is arranged to showcase Vic Flick`s mastery of the guitar. Pete walker, co-author of “John Barry: A Life In Music”, said this of Vic: “Vic Flick is the Sean Connery of the electric guitar. Accept no impostors.” All the tracks work, but some are even better than the others. For example, the perennially underrated Diamonds Are Forever gets an acoustic update with a sound that seems so new that you could almost submit it as an entirely new Bond song. It`s that good!

Flick`s strongest work on this album, apart from “Diamonds Are Forever”, is “Live and Let Die”, “For Your Eyes Only” and “Nobody Does It Better”. “Nobody Does It Better” is slightly marred though by a male voiceover that speaks the lines rather than sings them and the song seems to have no end, continuously tricking you into believing it`s over. On the other hand, Flick`s guitar and Bob Efford`s saxophone still make this rendition a must listen to.

James Bond & Beyond

The long-awaited first release from SpyGuise stereo, James Bond & Beyond, is now available. In Bondlike fashion, Michael Boldt singlehandedly takes on the world…ah, make that the world of spies…”Well, would you believe the music of spies worldwide?”

Eleven tracks grace this fine release including three original Boldt tunes “inspired by classic spy movies…”

The James Bond Theme
Mission: Impossible (T.V. series version)
Our Man Flint
The Wild, Wild West (T.V. series version)
Spies, Sleuths & Private Eyes
The Man From U.N.C.L.E.
The Persuaders
In Like Flint (Your Z.O.W.I.E. Face)
Get Smart
007 At Casino Royale
Mr. & Mrs. James Bond
How is your spy trivia memory…can you guess which three of the above are new compositions? (Tracks 5, 10 & 11)

Marvelous radio spots are also included as a thriller bonus following the music. I feel more like watching The Venetian Affair now than I have in quite some time. Number One Of The Secret Service is advertised, too, along with several others. “He’s loaded for action!” Never heard of One? It’s alright, I only know “one” friend with the poster for this hard-to-find-anywhere film!

The music is smooth and easy spy listening. Sometimes I want to kill the bad guys but mostly I want to groove. Get Smart has a thumping one-two-three back beat added. 007 At Casino Royale makes me want to dance on Carnaby Street with Moneypenny and David Niven’s Sir James Bond…or at least Austin Powers. Wild, Wild West and U.N.C.L.E. get their due, too. And of course, a spy guy named Bond.

Jeff Marshall has done his usual marvelous design job with the CD, inserts and liner notes. Connery and Vaughn always look good on the spy shelf. Lots of color gets splashed everywhere with a fun but crisp, minimalist, retro look. It’s “classic themes for secret agents,” baby.

Mike Boldt has provided some nice food within for musical thought (and taste). Thakfully for electronika, the album doesn’t sound “too clean”. It doesn’t have that overall feel/mix of being too synthesized, something that would instantly date and destroy a retro album like this one. Several talents also added to Mike’s on this, his first full-length spies album.

Visit spyguise.com to fetch your JB&B copy now.

—Matt Sherman had the thrill of a lifetime designing and writing notes for the James Bond NOW album for Vic Flick.

Music: Best of James Bond 30th Anniversary Set

1992 marked the 30th Anniversary of 007 on the big screen and to commemorate the occasion, EMI Records launched 2 different CDs. The first CD includeds the James Bond theme, plus all of the theme songs prior to Goldeneye. The Limited Edition, includes all of that plus several bonuses.

The Limited Edition contains rare and never before heard tracks. For example, it includes a demo version of YOU ONLY LIVE TWICE that has no claim of ownership. In other words, John Barry and others have been unable to figure out who sang this version. See the Lyrics page for the words to this unusual song. Also included is a jazzy version of Goldfinger sung by Anthony Newley (listen to it and you`ll understand why it was substituted with Shirley Bassey`s version). There are also two radio spots included as well as rare orchestral tracks from Goldfinger.

The Limited Edition includes 31 digitally remastered recordings on 2 discs and a 28 page booklet that includes notes, movie still photos and other collectable artwork. Shell out the extra few dollars and buy this edition over the standard one.

You Only Live Twice Theme

You only live twice, or so it seems,
One life for yourself, and one for your dreams.
You drift through the years and life seems tame,
Till one dream appears and love is its name.

And love is a stranger who`ll beckon you on,
Don`t think of the danger or the stranger is gone!

This dream is for you, so pay the price…Make one dream come true…You Only Live Twice.

And love is a stranger who`ll beckon you on,
Don`t think of the danger or the stranger is gone!

This dream is for you, so pay the price…Make one dream come true… You Only Live Twice.

You Only Live Twice: (Demo Version)

This version of You Only Live Twice has never been traced back to it`s author. Record searches of archives conducted by John Barry and associates have failed to turn up who performed this demo version and no one has yet stepped forward claiming to be the demo singer. Based on the tune and the lyrics, it`s not hard to see why!

You Only Live Twice,
no more than twice,
and each life you live,
you`re playing with dice!

The first game is love,
beware, it`s nice!
The second is death
whose cold arms entice you…

You gamble with danger…You gamble with love…Each one is a stranger…In a black velvet glove!

And if you should lose,
you`ll the pay the price,
good luck with the dice,
You Only Live Twice!

(repeat stanza)

You gamble with danger,
You gamble with love,
Each one is a stranger,
in a black velvet glove!

And if you should lose,
You`ll the pay the price,
Good luck with the dice…You Only Live Twice!

Tomorrow Never Dies Theme

[Performed by Sheryl Crow]

Darling I`m killed,
I`m in a puddle on the floor,
Waiting for you to return.

Oh, what a thrill,
Fascinations galore,
How you tease, how you leave me to burn.

It`s so deadly, my dear,
The power of having you near…

Until the day…Until the world falls away…Until you say, there`ll be no more goodbyes…I see it in your eyes…Tomorrow Never Dies.

Darling you won,
It`s no fun,
Martinis, girls and guns,
It`s murder on our love affair.

It`s you, that`s your life,
Every night, as you chase the morning light,
You`re not the only spy out there.

It`s so deadly my dear,
The power of wanting you near…

Until that day…Until the world falls away…Until you say there`ll be no more goodbyes…I see it in your eyes…Tomorrow Never Dies!

(repeat chorus)

Tomorrow Never Dies: “Surrender”

(Written by David Arnold; Performed by K.D. Lang)

Your life is a story,
I`ve already written,
The news is that I am in control…

…And I have the power,
To make you Surrender,
Not only your body but your soul…

Tomorrow Never Dies…Surrender…Tomorrow will arrive on time…I`ll tease and tantalize with every line…Till you are mine…Tomorrow Never Dies!

Whatever you`re after,
Trust me, I`ll deliver,
You`ll relish the world that I create…

Tomorrow Never Dies…Surrender…Tomorrow will arrive on time…I`ll tease and tantalize with every line…Till you are mine…Tomorrow Never Dies!

The truth is now…What I say…I`ve taken care of yesterday…

Tomorrow Never Dies…Surrender…Tomorrow will arrive on time…I`ll tease and tantalize with every line…Till you are mine…Tomorrow Never Dies!

Tomorrow Never Dies…Tomorrow Never Dies…Tomorrow Never Dies!

Thunderball Theme

He always runs while others walk.
He acts while other men just talk.
He looks at this world, and wants it all,
So he strikes, like Thunderball.

He knows the meaning of success.
His needs are more, so he gives less!
They call him the winner who takes all…
And he strikes, like Thunderball!

Any woman he wants, he`ll get…
He will break any heart without regret…
His days of asking are all gone…
His fight goes on and on and on…

But he thinks that the fight is worth it all…So he strikes like Thunderball

Thunderball: “Mr. Kiss-Kiss Bang-Bang”

The original title of the song for Thunderball was: Mister Kiss-Kiss Bang-Bang, (Japan`s name for Bond) sung by Dionne Warwick. (A Demo was cut by Shirlet Bassey as well!) At the last minute, the producers decided to go with the version sung by Tom Jones that incorporates the straighter title of “Thunderball” into the lyrics. (!)

Here are the lyrics to Dionne Warwick`s rejected rendition:

He`s tall and he`s dark,
And like a shark, he looks for trouble.

That`s why the zero`s double…Mr. Kiss-Kiss Bang-Bang

He`s suave and he`s smooth,
And he can sooth you like vanilla,

The gentleman`s a killer…Mr. Kiss-Kiss Bang-Bang

Madmoiselles and danger,
Have filled the stranger`s past.
Like a knife, he cuts through life,
Like everyday`s the last!

He`s fast and he`s cool,
He`s from the school that loves and leaves them,

A pity if it grieves `em…Mr. Kiss-Kiss Bang-Bang

Madmoiselles and danger,
Have filled the stranger`s past.
Like a knife, he cuts through life,
Like everyday`s the last!

He`s fast and he`s cool,
He`s from the school that loves and leaves them,

A pity if it grieves `em…Mr. Kiss-Kiss Bang-Bang`s…Not a fool…No, he`s no fool…he is no fool…he…is…no…fool

The World Is Not Enough Theme

The World Is Not Enough (Music by David Arnold, Lyrics by Don Black, Performed by Garbage)

I know how to hurt, I know how to heal…
I know what to show, and what to conceal…
I know when to talk, and I know when to touch…
No one ever died from wanting too much!

The World Is Not Enough…but it is such a perfect place to start, my love…And if you`re strong enough, together we can take the world apart, my love…

People like us, know how to survive,
“There`s no point in living if you can`t feel alive…”
We know when to kiss, and we know when to kill…
If we can’t have it all, then nobody will…

The World Is Not Enough, but it is such a perfect place to start, my love…And if you`re strong enough, together we can take the world apart, my love…

I feel safe, I feel scared, I feel ready…And yet unprepared…

The World Is Not Enough, but it is such a perfect place to start, my love…And if you`re strong enough, together we can take the world apart, my love…

The World Is Not Enough…
The World Is Not Enough…
No, no, ain`t near enough…
The World Is Not Enough!

The World Is Not Enough: “Only Myself To Blame”

[Performed by Scott Walker]

I`ve walked, way past Midnight,
I`ve driven for days,
I`ve tried to forget,
In so many ways.

I`ve held other arms,
But they don`t feel the same,
And I`ve Only Myself To Blame.

From city to city,
I still see your face,
It follows me all…all over the place,
I shouldn`t look back,
But I do, just the same,
And I`ve Only Myself To Blame.

I knew it was love…But when you are young…You think love will come, again…and again.

There`s no greater fool,
When the fool`s not afraid,
And I`ve Only Myself To Blame.

I knew it was love…But when you are young…You think love will come, again…and again.

There the fool`s not a fool.
When the fool`s not afraid…

…And I`ve only myself…only myself…Only Myself To Blame.

The Spy Who Loved Me Theme

[Performed by Carly Simon]

Nobody does it better,
Makes me feel sad for the rest.
Nobody does it half as good as you,
Baby, you`re the best.

I wasn`t looking, but somehow you found me,
I tried to hide from your love light,
But like heaven above me, The Spy Who loved Me,
Is keepin` all my secrets safe tonight…

…And nobody does it better,
Though sometimes I wish someone could,
Nobody does it quite the way you do,
Why`d you have to be so good?

The way that you hold me, whenever you hold me,
There`s some kind of magic inside you,
That keeps me from runnin` but just keep it comin`,
How`d you learn to do the things you do?…

…And nobody does it better,
Makes me feel sad for the rest,
Nobody does it half as good as you,
Baby, baby, darlin`, you`re the best…

Baby you`re the best…Baby you`re the best…Baby you`re the best…Darlin` you`re the best…Darlin` you`re the best…Baby you`re the best…Baby you`re the best…

The Man With The Golden Gun Theme: Alice Cooper

After the success of Live and Let Die by Paul McCartney and Wings, Alice Cooper thought EON may have been in the mood for an even heavier rock anthem, and thus presented him with his version of The Man With The Golden Gun. Here are the rejected lyrics to Alice Cooper`s submission:

Man With the Golden Gun [4:12]
Album: Muscle of Love, 1973

The man
With the golden gun
Is waiting
Somewhere
Out there
For you

But you`ll never see him
He`ll be looking for you

Demand
For the golden gun
It`s high priced
Precise
And true

But you`ll never see him
He`ll be looking for you

The man with the golden
Gun in his pocket, Oh, oh
The man with the golden
Gun in his case, Oh, oh
The man with the golden
Gun in your face
But you`ll never see him
He`ll be looking for you
You better believe
He`ll be looking for you

He-e-e-e-e-e`s, The man with the golden
Gun in his pocket
The man with the golden
Gun in his case
The man with the golden
Gun in his pocket
The man with the golden
Gun in your face

But you`ll never see him
He`ll be looking for you
You better believe
He`ll be looking for yo-ou

He-e-e-e-e-e`s, The man with the golden
Gun in his pocket
The man with the golden
Gun in his case
The man with the golden
Gun in his pocket
The man with the golden
Gun in your face

The man with the go-o-olden
Gun in his pocket
The man with the go-o-lden
Gun in his case
The man who gave you the golden gun

The Living Daylights: “Where Has Everybody Gone?”

(Performed by Chrissie Hynde and The Pretenders)

Where Has Everybody Gone?
I`ve got this feelin`, God, am I here on my own?
Where`s my support now, where`s the ranks of the strong?
In this faceless crowd, where can I belong?

Everybody`s gone insane to catch a plane to help the heavens closer,
They want the kingdom but they don`t want the king,
They want his throne.
(And) There`s no time, there`s no time at all!

Where Has Everybody Gone?
With great pleasure, I sing your national song,
Because you`re beautiful land will soon be long gone…
And the ashes of your memoirs will be strewn across the lawn!

Hack your face, save your case, reserve your place in the ever after,
Cause hallowed halls are lined with walls,
That are cracked with delirious laughter.
(And) There`s no time, there`s no time at all.

Where Has Everybody Gone?
There`s no time, there`s no time at all.
You won`t survive…and you`ll soon be long gone…gone, your gone…you`ll soon be long…gone!

The Living Daylights Theme

(Lyrics by Pal Waaktar and John Barry; Performed by A-ha)

Hey driver, where we going?
I swear, my nerves are showing.
Set my hopes up way too high,
The living`s in the way…we…die!

Comes the morning and the headlights fade in rain,
Hundred thousand people, I`m the one they frame.
I`ve been waiting long for one of us to say,
“To save the darkness and let it never fade away!”…

In The Living Daylights…In The Living Daylights (Oh, oh, oh-oh…The Living Daylights)

Alright, hold on tighter now,
It`s down, down to the wire.
Set your hopes up way too high,
The living`s in the way…we…die

Comes the morning and the headlights fade in rain,
Hundred thousand changes, everything`s the same.
I`ve been waiting long for one of us to say,
“Save the darkness and let it never fade away”…

In The Living Daylights…In The Living Daylights (Ihe Living Daylights)…In The Living Daylights (the Living Daylights)…

Comes the morning and the headlights fade away,
Hundred thousand people, I`m the one they frame!
In The Living Daylights…The Living Daylights (The Living Daylights)

The Living Daylights: “If There Was A Man”

(Performed by Chrissy Hynde and The Pretenders)

If There Was A Man, I could dream of,
I`d dream about a dream come true.
If There Was A Man, I could ever love,
I`d wait a million years for someone just like you.

All my life…I`ve been belating…never taking any chances…always hesitating…where`s the payoff?

Where`s the glory?
Where`s the one I`m holding out for,
Was he`s walking through the door,
The one that you walked through…if it isn`t you?

If There Was A Man, I could dream of,
I`d dream about a dream come true.
If There Was A Man, I could ever love,
I`d wait a million years for someone just like you.

Happy endings…never find me!
I`d put all my fantasies and hopes of love behind me,
All my moments…overdue but…

If There Was A Man out there for me…I wish it would be someone who…could love me true…if someone was you!

Robbie Williams` “Millennium”

Along with rapper Will Smith and many others, Brit superstar Robbie Williams jumped on the Millennium bandwagon in the late 90`s. Williams` “Millennium” sampled more than heavily from John Barry`s Bond theme for “You Only Live Twice.”

Williams, a huge Bond fan himself, has been touted and rumored to succeed Pierce Brosnan someday in the 007 role. Meanwhile, composer John Barry denies giving permission to Williams to sample You Only Live Twice for his runaway hit.

We`ve got stars directing our fate,
And we`re praying its not too late, Millennium.

Some say that we are players,
Some say that we are pawns,
But we`ve been making money,
Since the day that we were born,
Got to slow down, `cause we`re low down.

Run around in circles,
Live a life of solitude,
`Till we find ourselves a partner,
Someone to relate to,
Then we`ll slow down, before we fall down.

We`ve got stars directing our fate…And we`re praying its not too late…`cause we know we`re falling from grace…Millennium.

Live for liposuction,
And detox for your rent,
Overdose at Christmas,
And give it up for Lent.

My friends are all so cynical,
They refuse to keep the faith.
We all enjoy, the madness `cause we know we`re going to fade away.

We`ve got stars directing our fate…And we`re praying it`s not too late…`cause we know we`re falling from grace…Millennium.

Come, and have a go, if you think you are hard enough,
Come, and have a go, if you think you are hard enough,
Millennium…Millennium!

We`ve got stars directing our fate…And we`re praying it`s not too late…`cause we know we`re falling from grace, Millennium.

And when we come we always come to late,
I often think that we were born to hate,
Get up and see the sarcasm in my eyes.

And when we come we always come to late,
I often think that we were born to hate,
Get up and see the sarcasm in my eyes.

We`ve got stars directing our fate…Millennium…And we`re praying its not too late…Millennium…`cause we know we`re falling from grace…Millennium.

OHMSS: “We Have All The Time In The World”

This soulful ballad, performed by Louis Armstrong weeks before he passed away, is John Barry`s favorite Bond composition.

We Have All The Time in The World,
Time enough for life to unfold,
All the precious things love has in store.
We have all the love in the world,
If that`s all we have, you will find,
We need nothing more!

Every step of the way will find us…With the cares of the world far behind us…

We Have All The Time In The World,
Just for love,
Nothing more, nothing less,
Only love!

Every step of the way will find us…With the cares of the world far behind us…

We Have All The Time In The World…Just for love…Nothing more, nothing less…Only love…Only now!

OHMSS: “Do You Know How Christmas Trees Are Grown?”

One of the more surreal Bond tunes (and that is saying plenty!) was penned by John Barry and lyricist Hal David for the Lazenby classic, “On Her Majesty`s Secret Service”:

“La la la la la la la,
La la la la la la la.

Do You Know How Christmas Trees Are Grown? They need sunshine.
Sunshine can’t grow Christmas trees alone; They need raindrops.
Raindrops can’t grow Christmas trees, here’s the reason why;
In the winter rain will freeze, and the trees will die.

Do You Know How Christmas Trees Are Grown?…They need sunshine and raindrops, friendship and kindness and most of all…they need love.

Do you know how Santa gets around? He needs snowflakes.
Snowflakes cannot do it all, I found. He needs reindeer.
Reindeer, even tho’ they try, they need other things.
Once a year they have to fly, and they don’t have wings.

Do you know how Santa gets around?…He needs snowflakes and reindeer, sunshine and raindrops, friendship and kindness and most of all he needs love.

Do you know how Christmas cards are made? They need pictures.
Pictures can’t complete them I’m afraid. They need greetings.
Greetings say what’s in your heart, that’s what they are for.
But, when loved ones are apart, Christmas cards need more.

Do you know how Christmas cards are made?…They need pictures and greetings, sunshine and kindness and most of all…they need love.

La la la la la la la,
La la la la la la la.”

Octopussy Theme

“All Time High” [Performed by Rita Coolidge]

All I wanted, was a sweet distraction for an hour or two.
Had no intention to do, the things we`ve done.
Funny how it always goes with love, when you don`t look, you find.
But then we`re two of a kind, we move as one.

We`re An All Time High!…We`ll change all that`s gone before…Doing so much more, than falling in love.

On an All Time High…We`ll take on the world that way…So hold on tight, let the flight begin.

I don`t want to waste a waking moment, I don`t want to sleep.
I`m in so strong and so deep, and so are you.
In my time I`ve said these words before, but now I realize,
My heart was telling me lies, for you they`re true!

We`re An All Time High…We`ll change all that`s gone before…Doing so much more than falling in love!

On An All Time High…We`ll take on the world that way…So hold on tight, let the flight begin…So hold on tight, let the flight begin…We`re An All Time High!

Never Say Never Again Theme

[Written by Herb Alpert; Performed by Lani Hall]

Never, Never Say Never Again…never, Never Say Never Again…

You walk in a room,
A woman can feel the heat.
One look is a guarantee,
Nights could be, long and sweet.

The message is clear,
And like nothing I`ve ever known.
But from all that I hear,
Forget about long range plans,
`Cause this man`s, got his own!

To get mixed up with, a man who says, “Never,”
May be, big trouble, but then…

I just could be,
The woman to take you,
And make you say, “Never, Say Never Again,”…

…Never, Never Say Never Again…never, Never Say Never Again…never, Never Say Never Again….never, Never Say Never Again!

You`ve got all the moves,
And, but, baby I got `em too.
No matter your attittude, or your mood,
I`ll come through.

The touch of your voice,
The feel of your eyes on me,
You leave me no choice,
Though I know there`s danger there,
I don`t care, let it be!

To get in bed with, a man who says, “Never,”
May have no future, but then,
I just could be,
The woman to reach you,
And teach you, to Never Say Never Again.

I`ll bet you…I`ll get you…I`ll reach you…I`ll teach you…I`ll take you…I`ll make you!